Wednesday, October 10, 2007


http://farm1.static.flickr.com/174/444067989_62a1154446.jpg?v=0

I chose this image because I recently started a course of oriental dance and I find it really amazing but also relaxing. I decided to attend it almost by chance because my sister invited me to try something different from the classic activities done in the gym and I am enthusiastic. I also like Egyptian art and history and oriental dance is a way to get in touch with this culture, that seems very different from our. I would also like doing a journey in Red Sea, by now I did not have this opportunity but I hope I would soon be able to go there!

Finally, the two websites that I visit most are Google, where everybody can find lots of internet pages about the things he/she is searching for

http://www.google.it/

and

http://www.webshots.com/

It is a site of photo sharing, where one can find for free wallpapers and beautiful images for pc.

Bye!

Valeria

5 comments:

monica said...

Hi Vale, you already know that I am surprised about your choice to start the course of oriental dance but I think it's a good way to explore a completely different culture. A weekend ago I had the opportunity to work for an Egyptian company of marble and I met many Arabian people. At the beginning it was not very simple to have a relation with them because, apart from the differences in culture, they were also in Ramandam so they appeared to me quite strange. Later I discovered that the practice is not easy to follow: you are very tired and don't manage to have social relationships with people around you, not because you are not friendly but simply because you are concentrated in what you do, not to break a single rule. It was a great opportunity for me to discover a completely different world which I knew only through television and newspapers.
Thanks for the really interesting site about photo sharing.I visited it and found it beautiful.
bye bye
Mony

Elisa said...

hi Vale,
i'm very interested in practising an oriental sport or art...because they are known to be very useful from a physical and psychological point of view...for example a friend of mine who has done belly dance for several years said to me that this activity helps her to accpet her body and love her defects as well...

elenacarlet said...

Hi Vale!
I think you made a good choice starting practising oriental dance!It seems a very original sport and I'm sure it will permit you to understand something new about Egyptian culture. I think that it's important to open our mind to different culture, especially at this moment and in this world, where everyone is convinced that his culture is the best of all!

Valeria said...

Hi girls!
I have just read your comments and I think that we all agree in say that it is important to open our mind to cultures and to this aim I think that what we are studying, languages, is important because if we can not speak the language of one country we also can not be in touch with its people and culture. Are you agree?
Bye!
Vale

Silvia said...

Hi Valeria!
We really like the photo you chose and we also think that Oriental dance is a very nice passion! However, we have some suggestions to help you improve your work:
-Grammar: we found few grammar mistakes. To begin with, we think that with "recently" is better to put the present perfect "I’ve recently started" instead of the simple past; "Oriental" is to be written in capitals; "is a way to get in touch with this culture, which" instead of ",that"; "ours" instead of "our"; maybe it is better to put the construction "to go on a journey to the Red Sea" instead of "doing a journey in Red Sea"; Red Sea goes with the definite article; maybe it is better to put the expression "by now I haven’t had this opportunity" instead of the simple past, as you are referring to a moment which covers the present as well; "I visited the most" instead of "most"; "where one can search for free wallpapers" instead of "find for"
- Spelling: there are no spelling mistakes
-Vocabulary: it would be preferable to avoid the construction "but also" by simply putting "amazing and relaxing"; perhaps "usual" is better than "classic" when it is referred to the noun "activities"; maybe it is preferable to put the adjective "enthusiastic" with the preposition "about", i.e. " and I am enthusiastic about it"; maybe it is better to say "where you can find lots of internet pages about the things you are searching for", so that you address the reader in a more direct way.
-Structure: instead of having the presentation alongside the photo we think that it would be better to justify the text in order to catch the reader’s attention on what you are saying, so that it appears to be more effective. Moreover, you should separate the paragraphs ( i.e. the one about the course of Oriental dance from the other one about Egyptian art) in order to have a clearer lay-out.
-Punctuation: we think that in the third sentence it would be better to say : "I also like Egyptian culture and I think that Oriental dance is a way to get in touch with it"; in this way you can avoid the repetition of the conjunction "and" as well as the repetition of the concept "Egyptian culture".
Finally, as regards the websites, it is preferable to put just the clickable word integrated into the text rather than the complete link of the page.
See you soon!
Elisa Caramori
Silvia Nicolini